With important transfer business still needing to be done, Arsene Wenger spent deadline day in Rome for the Pope's Match for Peace. The following is a transcript of the text messages exchanged by Wenger and Arsenal chief executive Ivan Gazidis throughout the day.
Wenger: Please keep me informed today, Ivan. Maybe a good deed on this day will bring us good karma. Does the Pope believe in karma? :-/
Gazidis: I don't think so. Not sure.
Wenger: Grrrrr.
Gazidis: Don't worry Arsene, I'm confident things will go our way today. I'll keep you posted.
Wenger: Thx.
****
Gazidis: Danny Welbeck's here with the England squad. His agent offered him to us. Interested?
Wenger: Lololololololololol.
Gazidis: Ok.
Wenger: What's the dealio with Falcao?
Gazidis: Monaco want a £10m loan fee, player wants £346,000 a week. Man Utd, maybe City also interested.
Wenger: For a 28-year-old with one knee? Let United have him. They can tie him and Van Persie together and create one player with two good knees on four times the wages.
Gazidis: Haha ok.
Wenger: :-))
****
Wenger: Any other forwards? I'm starting to get the Sanogo sweats...
Gazidis: Welbeck could be best option. Wants a permanent deal, no loan. United closing in on Falcao.
Wenger: Uggggghhhhhh. Roberto Baggio is here. Maybe I should ask him to come out of retirement.
Gazidis: Haha.
Wenger: Baggio said no. Damn.
Wenger: Shevchenko overheard my offer, but I avoided his attempts to make eye contact.
****
Gazidis: So...Welbeck?
Wenger: Uggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. There's a little kid sitting behind me. I'll ask him if he wants to play for us.
Gazidis: I'll have Welbeck do a medical just in case.
Wenger: Kid doesn't speak English. Had no idea what I was saying.
Wenger: Ok on Welbeck medical. Just deny it if anyone asks. ;-)
Gazidis: Will do.
Wenger: ;-)
****
Gazidis: Running out of time...
Wenger: Ffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
Gazidis: Go on Welbeck? Also, I just remembered that you said you wanted a center back a couple weeks ago.
Wenger: Fine. Yes. Welbeck could work maybe. He's young. He's been playing out of position. Maybe United didn't F him up too much. Ok, let's do this. This could work. Whatever.
Wenger: Just don't pay more than what Liverpool paid for Balotelli. That comparison could make this deal look better for us when Mario decides he wants to be a chef in Tibet next year.
Wenger: As for CB...William Gallas still unattached?
Gazidis: Are you being serious? Sarcasm sometimes gets lost in text messages.
Wenger: Yes. Serious. :-/
****
Gazidis: Welbeck done. Have a statement for the press release?
Wenger: No thanks.
Gazidis: Ok. Here's the release.
Wenger: Lost the charity match...thanks for asking.
Gazidis: Sorry.
Wenger: Never relying on Pope karma again.
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